Arizona, United States
They belong to…
“I am 34, a mother to two wonderful girls and wife to a hard-working physician. I recently completed my doctorate in Accounting and am working as a professor of accounting at Arizona State University.”
What it’s like to walk in her shoes for a day…
“I wake up early, before the kids, to get breakfast ready and try and get myself together before the chaos of the morning. Usually my husband has left for work before the rest of us get up. I have breakfast with my kids which I appreciate and enjoy. Once the nanny arrives, I leave for work and spend the large chunk of my day at ASU working with students, teaching, preparing for classes, grading, etc. I am home in time for dinner which I wish I had more time to prepare and plan for. Sometimes my husband makes it home but often it is me and the girls. We then spend the evening reading books/playing until its time for bed. Once the kids are in bed I usually do some more work and then sit down for a few minutes of tv before bed.”
Growing up in her shoes she was…
“My parents always had high expectations of me. They expected me to succeed in school and were always encouraging. I never doubted they were proud of me and always knew I had their support.”
Her biggest challenges day-to-day…
“Being a working mom is hard. It is hard to juggle the expectations I have for myself with the realities of what I am able to do in a day. I feel guilty for not spending as much time with my kids, for not preparing a fancy enough dinner, for getting take-out more often that I want to. At the same time, I feel like I’m struggling to keep ahead at work and give my students all they need. Then on top of that trying to be an attentive and supportive wife and maintaining some semblance of a personal life and hobbies, is difficult. It’s a learning process and day-to-day figuring things out as we go.”
One thing you should know if you’re going to walk in her shoes…
“I think the challenges we face as women in the 21st century are similar to those faced by women throughout history. How to juggle being a mother, wife, worker, friend, daughter, all the roles we are expected to exceed at. Although much has improved, the workplace for women is still not where I believe it should be. During my time as a PhD student, I had 2 babies and went back to work while still nursing, so had to pump. With my first child, I was not given a private place to pump and as a result ended up working from home more often than was desired by my advisors. When asked about it, I told them (men) point blank that I had no place to pump and they were uncomfortable with the conversation and basically just moved on.
I have been asked multiple times why I need to work. Why do I need a job when my husband makes good money? And it was an honest question. There are prejudices that have existed and still do exist in our culture and they have become more apparent to me as I have matured and become a mother.”
Flashbulb memories (s) or what it’s really like to walk in her shoes…
“Since I was a young girl, I have excelled in subjects in school that are traditionally “male”. I loved math from a young age, was moved a grade ahead in math in 1st grade and ended up with a Bachelor’s degree in math (and now a PhD in accounting).
Beyond being a woman studying those subjects, I did not look like the stereotypical woman studying those subjects. I wore stylish clothes and make-up, dyed my hair blonde, I didn’t look like a “math nerd”. In college, the first day of one of my upper-division math courses, one of the male students turned to me and said “I think you’re in the wrong classroom.” It was opinions like these that drove me to prove people wrong and show them that cute girls can also be smart girls. I hope to be able to pass a similar lesson on to my daughters.”
Hey you, can you relate to EJ’s story? Do you have a favorite quote or thought? Share it in the comments
How about YOUR shoes?
“This story, it is unique, it is hers and it tells you something about being a woman in the 21st century.
If you identify as a woman, your story is just as important. CLICK HERE to get the questions and be part of our story, history and Her-story.”
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